What is this game?

Glorch's Great Escape is a challenging puzzle platformer where your only weapon is the almighty "Telenade," a grenade with a built-in teleporter. Guide Glorch from his prison cell through the defenses of his captor's space station, and help him escape on his impounded ship.

You'll be solving plenty of difficult platforming puzzles and scenarios, finding some secrets, smashing a few robots, and generally dying a whole bunch of times. We've made sure to include a freshly composed jazzy soundtrack to help keep your platformer rage levels in check.

So what is a Telenade, and why is Walking for Chumps?

Glorch can waddle left and right if he must, but he isn't even going to attempt to jump. That sounds like too much effort. Besides, why bother walking when you can just teleport wherever you want to go within range of a short throw? Only chumps would do that.

What is a Glorch anyway?

Glorch is a member of the Glorches, a race of...ahem..."big boned" purple aliens. They are the inventors of the Telenade.

How about a feature rundown?

Based on our top 20 Ludum Dare 32 entry of the same name
24 challenging levels, with additional extra-difficult "challenge" levels to unlock by reaching par milestones
Plenty of varied puzzles and scenarios to figure out, dangers to avoid, secrets to find, and deadly pits to fall into
Each level has been lovingly hand-crafted to find just the right balance of difficult and satisfying
Jazzy soundtrack? Yeah.

Glorch's Great Escape: Walking is for Chumps

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